Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Max's future Prom Date?

this past weekend we got a chance to visit with our friends Kathleen and Bryan - who have an adorable little girl named Agnes.
She is 4 months old and has Down syndrome.....oooooh Max is so lucky! We put the two babies next to each other and I was just tickled by how fond Max was of her. Just watch their hands!!!!! Oh god. So adorable I cannot stand it. He is so obviously in love with her.
He couldn't stop looking at her with adoration. And the hands! I couldn't deal with how they held hands. Killing me with sweetness.

So glad to have the chance to see them again. They live on the other side of LA which can feel like a different state or planet because of how long it might take to get there. Luckily our journey there only took us about 25 minutes. Not bad at all!
Hope to see more of them.

I am so far behind with postings and photos and videos. Will I ever catch up?
I have photos from a pool party, from the NDSC, from all about town.
anyhow - it is what it is - as they say.

Jerry and I are having such a great time watching Max develop and grow. He is a charmer. He is sweeping me off my feet every single day. What a blessing he is.

I went to a meeting last night and 2 people used the word retarded to express how they felt about themselves in their lives at the moment. It felt like a sharp knife through my heart. I thought about educating them. However - it's not always the right time. This was - an AA meeting. They are there sharing because it's a safe place to do so. I didn't want to go up to them and tell them that what they shared was "wrong". especially since both were having a hard time. Not good. Need to learn how to be loving, and respect others and allow space in between when people say something like that - and when i choose to share my experience with them.

Eunice Shriver passed away today. I want to know more about her and the incredible service she did for people with disabilities. I'm already blown away by what I've been learning of her. I would like some of that to rub off on me. I want to come at this from a place of love - not of fighting people for saying a word. People are doing their best. A few people this weekend offered advice to me about being a mom to a child with Ds. They don't have children with Ds. What they actually said was more like a backhanded compliment. They don't really know what they said - they didn't really hear it or think about how it would feel if I said something similar to them. I do need to find out what feels right for me in each moment and speak up when I can come from a loving place. I am VERY GOOD at coming from an angry "prickly pear" place. But that doesn't work for me or anyone else.

I'm coming up on 22 years of Sobriety a week from today.
feels surreal.
I feel like I know now why I got sober at 18.
Why I moved to Minneapolis to get more grounded in my recovery
Why I slowly made my way back to Los Angeles where I was born.
Why I have had the opportunity to learn how to be present in the world without harming myself - or running - or hiding.

It feels like - I am better prepared to be Max's mama. To learn to be his Advocate - and to get out of my own way so I can be of service.

I've done many things in my lifetime - but this certainly is the most meaningful.

Love you Max!!!

P.S. he loves Michael Jackson, Elton John, and his mama singing to him.


Sharon said...

Max and Agnes are so sweet together! Really, too cute for words.

It is amazing how past events in our lives prepare us for today. You're an amazing mom and certainly the very best mom for Max!

Hector and Jennifer Varanini Sanchez said...

Great post and it was a pleasure to meet you and your family! I too get hurt by the "r" word and most of the time I know it isn't meant to be hurtful and it really is hard to find the right time to "educate" people about it. I still haven't figured out the best way or best time. Learning as I go :)

Renee' said...

What a cute video. I so loved the way that max didn't take his eyes off her until he got interested in the blanket or something else on the floor. Wouldn't it be cool if they really end up going to the prom together!!! Max is such a cutie pie and has beautiful eyes. He will make a great boyfriend one day he already knows that hand holding is enjoyable in any relationship